After a succession of miscarriages shattered a Georgia couple’s concept of what their family would look like, they surrendered to their faith to write a new narrative. Years later, they are proud homeschooling parents to 12 kids and can’t imagine life without them.
Washington-born stay-at-home mom Carly Bojczuk, 40, is married to her high school sweetheart, Illinois-born David Bojczuk, 42, pastor of Cartersville Outreach Ministry and deputy chaplain of the local jail. They live in Georgia.
“A lot of people say, ‘God is good!’ when something good happens, like a healing, but God is good all the time,” Carly told The Epoch Times. “Most people grow in ways they never could without that trying circumstance. I know we did. I wouldn’t change any part of our trials and tribulations; it’s part of our testimony, our story.”
Loss After Loss
The couple had a plan: they wanted four children, two to three years apart in age. Their plan was halfway to completion when Carly’s third pregnancy in 2003 ended in heartbreak. At her first ultrasound, with David and their two kids in attendance, they received the shocking news that their baby had passed.“Almost instantly, I felt cold and numb,” Carly said. “David and I didn’t know how to navigate this type of grief. We didn’t know anyone who had had a miscarriage.
“Kelsey and William were young, three and one, so we just told them that the baby wasn’t well, passed away, and was with Jesus. Calling family and friends to let them know we were no longer expecting a Christmas baby was difficult. ... no one knew what to do or say,” she said.
The family processed their grief as best they could. Five months later, Carly became pregnant again.
“I was due on my birthday, the perfect present,” she said. “As I got closer to the eight-week appointment, my anxiety grew, but I reminded myself that worrying didn’t do any good, and I ‘cast my cares on God.’”
God’s Plan
While children Kelsey and William “made life that much fuller,” Carly and David longed to add to their family.When the Christmas due date of their “angel baby” came and went, their pain intensified. David gifted his wife an ankle bracelet bearing two angel birthstone charms. Sadly, she would be adding several more, seven in total.
Carly said: “On New Year’s Eve, David and I sat on the couch taking inventory of the year. We held each other close. Our whispers turned into sobs as we talked about our ‘four children plan.’
“We sank to our knees and cried out to God, deep in our grief, asking Him to heal my womb. ‘God, we’ll take as many children as you have for us,’ we pleaded. That day, we decided we would try to be content with our two children, and trust that His plan was better than ours.”
Two months later, Carly became pregnant with twins. Matthew survived, but his brother died in utero at seven weeks. After Carly’s fourth miscarriage, she needed a dilation and curettage procedure and testing that sadly shed no light on the reason for her many losses.
“We’ve had seven miscarriages over the years,” she said. “It had been 12 years since our last miscarriage, then we had our most recent miscarriage in February 2022, right before our newest baby, Rosalee.”
While the pain of loss will last forever, Carly and David now marvel at their super-sized family and thank the Heavens that “God had a different plan.”
‘They’re the Future’
Just as big of a surprise as being mom to 12 for Carly was becoming a homeschooling mom. Despite the fact that David was homeschooled and enjoyed it, Carly initially lacked the confidence to teach their own children.“When William was in kindergarten, his teacher told me he was bored, and suggested I start teaching him some,” she said. “On Saturdays, I would have fun lessons for William and included Kelsey. William absorbed everything I came up with and learned to read.”
Her successful Saturday classes gave Carly the confidence to homeschool her children full-time. A typical day begins with a family devotional and prayer circle.
“Caroline and Anna are in ninth and eighth grades; they also do their math on a computer curriculum, and do their grammar while I’m working with the younger children so I’m close by to answer questions.”
After language and grammar comes group science or history classes, on rotation. Carly helps Olivia and Matthew, who are both dual-enrolled taking college courses at high school, in the evenings. Homeschool takes place around the dining table, on the porch, and even on a blanket in the grass in good weather.
One of Carly and David’s biggest challenges is spending quality time with each individual child, but homeschooling allows Carly to be with her kids almost 24/7. The diligent parents take their kids with them to run errands for extra one-on-one time.
“You make time and plan for what’s important to you, and our children are what’s important to us,” Carly said. “They are what we’re investing in, they’re the future! If we mess that up, then nothing else will matter.”
As Carly and David’s 12 children grow, so their different personalities infuse the family with diversity, and their bonds intensify. Carly is starting to enjoy “how our adult children’s relationships have left the squabbling of childhood behind and morphed into something even more beautiful.”
“We don’t really have a motto, but if we did it would be something like, ‘If God blesses you with children, He’ll give you the tools and wisdom to raise them successfully,’” Carly said. “Daily, we have faith that God is doing work in our lives and our children’s lives. There is never a place so dark that the light can’t find it.”