After an eye-opening trip to New York City, a Virginia-based couple with eight kids decided to implement a new idea in their home: a technology-free room that encourages their children to talk, play, and enjoy quality time without any screens or technology.
Software executive Ben Collins, 40, and his wife, Adele Collins, 40, a stay-at-home mom, have seven daughters and one son, ranging in age from 16 years to 5 months old.
Years ago, the Collins family had an opportunity to visit Yale Club with their friends.
“When we walked in, it felt like we were walking into a bygone era; there’s a dress code so everyone has to wear a blazer or skirt, and there are strict rules around technology use so people aren’t on their phones,” Mrs. Collins told The Epoch Times. “But as we looked around, we realized there was a great atmosphere; people were talking, playing games, having a drink.”
This felt like a great contrast from what they'd normally expect in a public place, where everyone is mostly glued to their phones.
That summer, the family, who moved from California to Virginia, made it a priority to create a room where they would prioritize talking to each other, playing games, reading, and such things—thus the Collins family’s tech-free study was born.
There are no TVs or computers in the study, and no phones, iPads, or laptops. Instead, there is “always someone reading a book, playing the piano, playing a game, or reading the newspaper.” In the winter, it’s a cozy space with a roaring fireplace. Meanwhile on Saturday mornings, there is always someone “hiding” from their chores in the study, curled up with a good book.
“You would be just as likely to find the kids building forts or walk in on a healthy debate about philosophy. We have a family culture of discussing a variety of topics,” Mrs. Collins said. “It’s also where we gather to pray as a family, where Ben smokes a pipe in the evening, and where we often host friends. We recently added a record player to the room, so I guess it’s not entirely tech-free anymore!”
This zone has helped them build a “robust family culture.” The children are growing up in an environment where they are encouraged to read, play, and debate together. The kids have also been able to express themselves creatively by coming up with their own skits and games, just as their parents did when they were growing up.
Surprisingly, it seems like only the parents have slipped up as they’re sometimes caught using their phones in the tech-free zone.
“We’re also the ones who are often looking for a quiet place to work, and the ’study' is one of the rooms of the house that has a door that closes,” Mrs. Collins said.
One of Mr. and Mrs. Collins’s challenges has been navigating the use of computers for their children’s schooling.
“The decision we’ve made is that, until high school, our kids don’t have access to a computer for daily homework,” Mrs. Collins said. “This has been something that we’ve communicated to their schools. ... We’ve been pleasantly surprised with how supportive and accommodating their teachers and administrators have been towards this goal.”
“Keeping our kids off of social media has been important. There are tons of studies that show how harmful smartphones and social media have been for our kids,” Mrs. Collins said. “Keeping our kids off phones has allowed them to just be kids; they hang out with friends, walk to town to get lunch, go for a hike, or bake cookies.”
Mrs. Collins believes that as a society we have become obsessed with “safety” and try to be extra cautious with outdoor activities such as climbing a tree or playing in a creek.
“But parents give each kid a smartphone, which is actually the single greatest source of danger, especially with the potential for predatory adults contacting kids and teenagers on social media,” Mrs. Collins said. “We have it all backwards.”
To any other family wanting to create their own “tech-free zone” but who may not be able to dedicate an entire room, Mrs. Collins insists that it’s not a matter of space.
“You could start by saying your dining room is free of technology, so, no phones at the table ever,” she said. “Or, you could put a basket by your front door and have family members place phones inside as they enter into the home. If you have a television in your living room, you could either cover it, place it in a cabinet with doors, or switch to a ‘frame’ TV that displays art when not in use.”
By encouraging traditional activities over the use of technology, Mr. and Mrs. Collins have seen the quality of their children’s relationships “flourish,” since they are spending time together “in real life, rather than through the facade of social media.” And it seems like their experiment is here to stay.
