The father of a baby boy born with a bilateral cleft lip and palate was shocked when a former friend said that the dad-of-two would surely understand if parents in the same position would want to abort. At that moment, he stood up for his son, and all people with differences, sharing that every life has value.
Matt Martin, 32, is a baker and independent filmmaker from Dallas, Texas. Neither he nor his ex-wife knew that their son, Cam, had a cleft lip and palate until he was born.
“He’s a twin, and getting good sonograms of both of them was a little difficult,” Matt told The Epoch Times. “I was shocked ... I didn’t know anything about clefts, so I was scared of the unknown.”
After a smooth pregnancy, Matt’s ex-wife gave birth to twin boys Cam Dawson Martin and Jack Carson Martin minutes apart on April 3, 2018, by scheduled Caesarean section. Holding Cam for the first time was an emotional experience for Matt.
Soon, the little boy was whisked away to the NICU so that his medical team could make sure he was able to feed. After they discovered that he was able to take in a decent amount of food, he was transferred to his parents’ room two days later. Matt said that seeing Cam, people apologized and cried for them. The doctor also apologized for their sonogram tech not catching it, as, if it had been detected, it would have made them more prepared.
However, the doting dad fell in love with both his babies without prejudice despite not everyone in his social network feeling the same way.
Matt told The Epoch Times that one weekend, a few months after Cam’s birth, he was in a “dreaded group text with friends and they started talking about politics.”
He recalled: “Two of them started arguing about abortion, and one ‘friend’ roped me in by saying, ‘Matt should understand why someone would want an abortion. If you guys had known about Cam’s cleft, surely you’d get an abortion. Or at least understand why someone in the same situation would.”
This shocked Matt, and since that day, he hasn’t spoken to that person. He said: "At minimum, it was used to get a reaction out of me, to get me into the conversation. At worst, that was their opinion, that we would’ve aborted our son because of a facial difference. Either way, that’s not someone I want to have a friendship with.
“I’m a Christian, and my religious beliefs back up what my personal beliefs were before becoming a Christian.”
Cam’s cleft lip and palate was a difference, but with a workable solution. Matt and his ex-wife learned to feed Cam and clean his mouthpiece, called a Nasoalveolar Molding (NAM) device, which was used to cover his palate. Matt also felt brighter about Cam’s future after he met with his surgery team.
The little boy has had three successful surgeries to date, with at least one more to go.
“His lip repair was when he was about 3 months old, and his palate repair was when he was 1 1/2 years old,” Matt said. “He will have a bone graft surgery to repair his gums in a couple of years ... they’ve all gone pretty smooth so far; he has an incredible surgeon.”
Matt does not consider his son disabled. Nor does he think Cam’s life has any less value than anybody else’s. He hopes that most people would share the same opinion.
Matt says that though he has no idea whether Cam’s story has changed anyone’s mind, he hopes it has at least opened minds.
He added: “I’ve had a lot of people from all over the world that are parents of kids with clefts reach out and share their stories with me, and that’s been amazing.”
Cam and his twin brother, Jack, turned 4 years old in April 2022 and will attend pre-K in the fall. Sharing more about Cam’s personality, Matt said: “He’s funny, artistic, a little sassy at times, and really sweet,” adding that while his cleft defined the earliest part of his life, it won’t define his whole life.
The proud dad reflected: “He’s growing into such an incredible kid, and I can’t wait to see the person he becomes and what life has in store for him.”
