Staying with friends or family when in a new town or city on a business or pleasure trip can add a very pleasant “at home” touch, but make sure your hosts are enjoying your stay as much as you are.
Don’t Expect Room Service
Your hosts are just being gracious when they say, “Make yourself at home.” You are staying in their home, so it’s important that you treat the home and everything and everyone in it, including their children and pets, with the utmost care. If you need fresh bed linens or towels, or need to do laundry, do it yourself, after first asking permission to use their laundry room. When you get up, make the bed every morning, and don’t leave the bathroom a mess. Resist the urge to have a snack in the bedroom or anywhere else in your host’s home other than at the dinner table, and clean up after yourself.Bring Your Own Toiletries
To avoid imposing on your hosts, supply your own bed linens, bath towels, and toiletries. If bringing these items isn’t practical, you can purchase them locally upon arriving. When choosing what to buy, opt for nicer items, which has the dual benefit of making your stay more enjoyable and being better to leave to your hosts for their use after you depart. If your hosts are feeding you, supply at least some of the food, beverages, and fun items such as desserts or wine. Here too, get the “good stuff” and enough to allow your hosts to enjoy it as well.Be Invisible
It’s expected that you will be coming and going during your stay, but take care to make sure your activities don’t interrupt those of the host. Try to avoid too many late-night arrivals, and take care not to leave your vehicle blocking theirs when they need to take the kids to school and get to work. If they have pets and you enjoy playing with them, don’t decide to have a raucous game of tug in the middle of the night; the pet might be overjoyed, but your host and their family will not be quite as amused.The Fish Rule
Don’t overstay your welcome, even if your hosts insist you “stay as long as you like.” Benjamin Franklin said it best: “Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days.” The close confines of an apartment or home can begin to grate when the normal routine is interrupted by houseguests, even if they are dearly loved. Don’t show up unannounced—or with an unexpected plus-one—and before arriving, make it clear how long you wish to stay and when you will be leaving. If the living room couch is “your room,” your presence will begin to grow a bit stale quickly as your hosts have to work and live around you.Show Your Gratitude
When on vacation, visiting a new place and experiencing new sights, it’s easy to take the accommodations for granted when you are staying with friends or family, so slow down a bit and show appreciation. Consider making dinner one night or taking your hosts and their family out to dinner. Pitching in to help with routine chores, such as walking the dog, doing the dishes, and taking out the trash, and sending a handwritten note and a nice gift card no more than two days after your departure will go a long way to earning you “Most Favorite Houseguest” honors—and return visit invitations.
