Priority-Centered Living: A Conversation With Productivity Expert Tanya Dalton

Productivity expert and author Tanya Dalton. Tanya Dalton

For many people, the beginning months of the year are a time for hard work, reaching for big goals, and trying to keep up with the many demands of life. It can be challenging to balance each aspect of life while finding meaning and happiness through it all. We asked productivity expert Tanya Dalton, the best-selling author of The Joy of Missing Out, host of The Intentional Advantage Podcast, and founder of inkWELL Press for her advice. 

"Purposeful Productivity: Multiply Your Time and Your Happiness," by Tanya Dalton. Tanya Dalton

The Epoch Times: What inspired you to write your new book, “Purposeful Productivity: Multiply Your Time and Your Happiness?”

Tanya Dalton: There are a lot of productivity books out there and they all promise to increase your time… the only problem is that most people don’t actually have the time to read them! Sitting down to slog through a 200+ page book is a real time commitment. I wanted to write something that would be simple to implement but also really easy to digest. 

My newest book is a daily reader with short excerpts that take less than five minutes to read, followed by two questions designed to help you either implement a strategy or think further about how you can integrate this in your life.

The Epoch Times: Most people, presumably, want to have productive days and live productive lives. It can be easy, though, to get caught up in a constant state of “being busy” or feeling overwhelmed by all the things there are to do. Where do you find most people falter when it comes to living productively, but also, happily?

Ms. Dalton: Busy has become a big buzzword in our society. We rush through our days, and more often than not, we find ourselves with a to-do list that stretches about five miles long. We feel pride in that fat line crossing out a task, proving that we are qualified to wear our badge of busy.

Our worth is not tied to the length of our to-do list. Yes, it makes us feel busy, but it doesn’t make us productive. But too many of us tie our self-worth to our busyness. Stress and overwhelm are badges of honor declaring our worthiness. We falsely believe that if we are not busy, we are failing. In the pursuit of finding balance, we try to do everything, but the more we do, the less we succeed.

The Epoch Times: Your work has focused on the importance of identifying what’s important and prioritizing what to focus on. How can people better recognize the most important things they should be doing each day?

Ms. Dalton: There’s no magic system we can simply “plug into.” I really believe that productivity should be customized to you and your priorities.

That’s why productivity hacks or tricks may have failed you in the past—it’s the struggle to make your life fit the system when, in fact, it should be the system that fits your life. You can customize your productivity so that your life and your priorities are at the center.

But it can be difficult to know what’s truly important. We are so bombarded with tasks and requests that they blind us, and we lose sight of what is truly important. We pile more and more priorities on ourselves, which does nothing but weigh us down, keeping us from the life we want.

Here’s a simple strategy I share in my new book.

To make the process easier, I’ve created the CLEAR framework to help you differentiate the important from the merely urgent:

C—Connected: Is this task connected to my North Star? L—Linked: Is it linked to a goal? E—Essential: Is it something that can only be done by me? A—Advantageous: Will I see a good return on my investment? R—Reality-based: Does this task really need to happen, or is it tied to a story I’m telling myself?

The process of “getting CLEAR” is easy. Just use what I call the five-finger test. Ask yourself the five questions in the CLEAR framework, and each time you answer yes, simply raise a finger. If you have three or more fingers raised, you know the item deserves to be treated as important. Two fingers or fewer? That’s an unimportant task.

The Epoch Times: Have you always been a productive person or was there a moment when you had a breakthrough in understanding how to look at time management and living a fulfilling life?

Ms. Dalton: Funny enough, my whole perspective on productivity shifted dramatically one evening while I cooked a pot of spaghetti. My kids were little and I was fully in the trenches of motherhood and work.

It had been an excruciatingly long, busy day filled with errands and tasks and all kinds of other nonsense, so I was exhausted. I heard my husband pull into the garage, but he didn’t come in. I waited a full 5 minutes before I stomped over to the door and flung it open ready to just let loose my anger. And when I saw him laughing with the radio, I thought to myself: I would never just sit in the car laughing when there’s so much to do!

And that stopped me cold. When had I become a person who didn’t have time to just sit and laugh?

I’d always thought of myself as productive, but I wasn’t really. I think I fell victim to the same thinking that most people do: that if I check a lot of things off my to-do list, if I spend the whole day running around and skipping lunch because of all the things I do, I am productive. But it wasn’t true.

It made me sad, but it also showed me that I had clearly confused busy with productive. And that there’s no reason to go through life with a completed checklist and no time for happiness. It just didn’t make sense.

The Epoch Times: Are there any areas of productivity that you still find challenging?

Ms. Dalton: As an overachiever, a people pleaser, and a perfectionist ... absolutely! I have to remind myself from time to time to not confuse the relationship with the request when I’m tempted to say “yes” to something that doesn’t really align with my priorities. Just like so many others, I have to remember to set up clear boundaries.

One of the key phrases I use that helps me is: Every time you say “yes” you are saying “no” to something else. Anytime I’m tempted to say “yes” to something I’m not truly excited about, I stop and think about what I’m actually saying “no” to—usually it’s time with family, working on a passion project, or one of my goals. When I realize that, it makes it easier for me to make the choice to say no.

I think people often think that people like me who write these kinds of books must be perfect human beings who never struggle. The truth is we write the books we do because we understand the struggle. I’d like to think that makes me a better writer and a more relatable guide to help others feel more productive.

The Epoch Times: What do you wish most people understood about managing their time and their life?

Ms. Dalton: At its core, productivity is about making a series of choices. Choices have the power to make us genuinely productive rather than simply busy.

By not making choices and allowing others’ priorities to become our own, we will never feel truly productive, no matter how many tasks we check off our lists. Allowing our priorities to sit front and center is a daily decision. It’s purposely choosing to let go of what is unimportant—or at least loosening your grasp.

The lesson I’ve learned through all my work is: Your happiness isn’t defined by others; it is defined by you and the daily choices you make.

The Epoch Times: What motivates you to continue doing the work you do?

Ms. Dalton: I am addicted to the lightbulb moments when people see just how easy it is to have the life they want. Everything I teach and share is—what I call—small, huge movements. Simple to manage, easy to implement but monumental in the impact it can make on your life. When people see just how easy it is to make these small shifts in their lives, their eyes light up and I can see the fire is there. That makes it easy to be passionate about the work I do.