Imparting Dignity

Our approach to others, combined with a simple definition of terms, can lead to nobility

Treating those around us with dignity and in a respectful manner benefits them by enhancing their own sense of self-worth. Fei Meng

Recently, a magazine editor told me that he hopes his writers ennoble their readers.

Now, there’s a word rarely heard these days. His comment sent me to my online dictionary for specifics, where I found the definition he doubtless intended: “to lend greater dignity or nobility of character to.” Certainly a worthy goal, and one that shouldn’t be restricted to the editor’s workhorses.

After thinking about it, I concluded that enhancing dignity or nobility in another is in itself a noble goal. If we treat women as ladies and men as gentlemen, we ennoble not only them, but our own souls as well.

Ladies and Gents

But that last thought brings up three more words—"ladies,” “gentlemen,” and “soul”—that appear as rarely in our daily conversation as the word ennoble. Some even disdain these terms as musty and dated, right up there with “groovy” and “far out.”

Yet these old-fashioned concepts continue to find staunch defenders. In her online article “10 Qualities of a Lady,” Maria Doll plays on an old saying to make these distinctions: “Being female is a matter of birth, being a woman is a matter of age, but being a lady is a matter of choice.” Among Doll’s 10 points are a mix of characteristics that mark a lady; among them are manners, dress, civility, and a strong work ethic.

Doll applies many of these standards to men as well. In her companion piece, “10 Qualities of a Gentleman,” she writes: “A gentleman models civility in how he treats others. He demonstrates respect, restraint, and personal responsibility in all his interactions. He is honorable, and values and respects others.”

So why introduce “soul” into this equation? Though more complex in its definition than lady or gentleman, most sources mention that an individual’s soul is a unique combination of life, thought, feeling, and will. It’s the very essence of being human, the core of who we are.

Mix these elements together and we can assert with some assurance that a lady or a gentleman who regards fellow human beings as souls possesses the power to ennoble them.

Ennobling Others

With a little thought and care, it’s an easy thing to do. In the workplace, for example, we can use polite language when addressing our coworkers—“please” and “thank you” are basic starters. We can praise the deserving for a job well done. When these same workers come to us with a complaint or a question, we can put down the phone and actively listen to them. We can offer encouragement to that new employee who seems so unsure of herself, and we can laugh at ourselves when we commit some minor blunder. A smile and a sense of humor cover a multitude of peccadillos.

The philosophy to which we adhere in how we view our fellow human beings is therefore of vital importance and can determine whether we lift people up or degrade and denigrate them. If an office manager—and I’ve seen this happen—favors an administrative assistant because of her attractive looks rather than for her skills, whatever his intentions, he wounds her by diminishing her dignity and competence in her own eyes and in the eyes of her peers.

Impart dignity to those in our charge and care, and we ennoble them and ourselves. And the repercussions and rewards of such attempts can be great. Imagine a home, a workplace, a community, and even a nation where people treat their families, friends, and strangers—including those on social media—with respect, as one-of-a-kind creations rather than as stereotypes or lumps of flesh.

The first step in that transformation starts with us. And it’s a win-win all the way around.