‘Good Things Come to Those Who Wait’: The Virtue of Patience

"Patience," 1542, by Giorgio Vasari. Public domain

Patience is a virtue, and good things come to those who wait. These are things that we remind others of, but do we truly believe them, and are they always applicable? Where do these sayings come from?

Patience Is a Virtue

First, let’s start with the saying “patience is a virtue.” The word “patience” used to carry so much richness. Think of, for example, the phrase “the patience of Job.” Based on the common, modern-day use of “patience,” Job exhibited a quality far, far greater than that. Imagine losing all of your children and wealth in a single day, having horrible sores all over your body and a wife who tells you to disavow your faith, and being falsely accused, yet enduring faithfully all the while.

But if we delve deeper into the term, we find that the phrase fits Job’s story perfectly.

Patience used to be considered one of the highest virtues, but, probably reflective of an earlier era in which perhaps the standards people held themselves to were higher, it carried the meaning of being able to endure suffering, including long-term suffering. It has been a central part of not only Judeo-Christian teachings, but also of Buddhist and Hindu ones.

Buddhist tradition emphasizes something called “kshanti” (in Sanskrit), or “khanti” (in Pali), which means patience, forgiveness, and forbearance. This is considered one of the essential qualities required for achieving spiritual perfection and enlightenment.

In the Hindu tradition, patience and forbearance are central concepts. The emphasis is on not only enduring without complaint, but also enduring cheerfully and calmly.

As for etymology, it turns out that “patience” and “suffering” go hand-in-hand. The word “patience” has its origins in the Latin word “patientia,” which means “the quality of suffering or enduring.” This also gives us a sense of the origins of “patient,” as referring to someone who endures an illness and medical treatment.

Good Things Come to Those Who Wait

The proverb “good things come to those who wait” is thought to have originated from another quote, “All things come to those who wait.” The proverb’s origins likely come from a poem by Lady Mary Montgomerie Currie (1843–1905), writing under her pseudonym, Violet Fane, in her poem, ‘Tout vient a qui sait attendre’:

All hoped-for things will come to you Who have the strength to watch and wait, Our longings spur the steeds of Fate, This has been said by one who knew.

‘Ah, all things come to those who wait,’ (I say these words to make me glad), But something answers soft and sad, ‘They come, but often come too late.’ “Good things come to those who wait” became the lasting version of the phrase, for reasons unknown. However, it is easy to imagine why that was preferred over the “All things” version.

In modern times, the proverb has, of course, become a popular saying used to encourage patience and perseverance. It has been used in advertisements, movies, and television shows, and has been adapted to fit different contexts, such as “good things come to those who work hard and wait” or “good things come to those who are patient and persistent.”

Interestingly, the Guinness brewing company adopted the phrase (“good things come to those who wait”) for an advertising campaign in the 1990s and 2000s, which was meant to encourage bartenders to take the time to pour the beer properly, and to help consumers appreciate that the time waiting for the proper pour would be worth it. (The estimated time for the proper pour was a whopping 119.5 seconds.)

Some may remember the Heinz ketchup ad campaign of the 1980s that used the slogan “The best things come to those who wait.” Predating the age of squeeze-bottle ketchup, the campaign was meant to emphasize that the thick, quality product took time to emerge from the glass bottle, but that this was the point—that it was robust and not watery. The ads stated, “When you’ve got something this thick, this rich, why waste time with anything else?” Sadly, in today’s instant-gratification society, it’s doubtful whether this would cut it. Patience just isn’t what it once was.

The Value of Patience

Years ago, I had a profound experience with “patience,” in perhaps the older sense of the term. An older family member had experienced a stroke since I last saw her, and her speech was somewhat affected. We were spending a few hours together, catching up. As I tried to kindly understand her when she spoke, I found myself feeling anxious at not being able to. But then I thought, “Patience, Angelica. Just relax and let go of that anxiety.” Suddenly, after that, I was able to understand her for the remainder of the visit! Little did I know that this would be the last time I saw her. Somehow, exercising that patience seemed to open up my own hearing, brain, or perhaps heart. Whatever it was, it allowed me to not only connect but also understand.

It is certainly true that patience and work bring their rewards. Job worked on his thoughts and worked through the pain. He worked to overcome all of the trials and be worthy.

Many good things in life normally take a period of waiting. Learning new skills can result in very good things coming your way. But some of them require a tremendous amount of waiting (patience) before you see real results. This is true for anything that is done at a very high level.

For all who are reading this, I wish you patience, perseverance, and fortitude—whether it be in your efforts to gain skills, in your ability to endure life’s challenges while remaining faithful, or in your personal relationships.