When you learn of someone else’s good fortune—some positive development in their lives—what’s your honest first reaction? Are you genuinely happy for them or do you feel a twinge of envy that the good fortune isn’t yours?
Recognize
Becoming observant of your thoughts and emotions is a valuable skill. If you can recognize envy when it shows up, pause and notice how it makes you feel and ask yourself what you’re really envious of.For example, if you see someone enjoying more wealth and you feel a sense of envy, ask yourself, is it wealth you covet? Perhaps it’s the status the wealth could bring or the freedom the wealth may allow. Dig deeply to uncover what it is that’s bringing out this sense of envy.
Rather than allowing this envy to fester and engender negative emotions toward a fellow human being, you can utilize it to be a source of information. It can point to areas in your own life that you may want to dedicate more focus on, and you can, in turn, feel thankful to that person for showing you greater possibilities in life.
Celebrate
The good fortunes of others are truly something to celebrate, even if you’re thinking from the perspective of your own personal benefit. When you discover envy in yourself, begin fostering the habit of replacing that negative reaction with a positive one of celebrating good fortune.After all, in addition to altruistically caring for and being happy for someone other than yourself, you can celebrate the fact that that person has shown you what’s possible, and that’s hopeful for you, too.
The very fact that someone in your community experiences good fortune has an uplifting and inspiring effect on the community at large—another idea worth celebrating.
Serve
When you’ve developed a habit of celebrating the good fortunes of others, you may find yourself inspired to engender more good fortune for others. Whether in your career, your community, your family, or elsewhere, how can you put your particular skills and talents to use in service of others? Approaching life in this way, one in which you aim for others’ good fortune, is an excellent way to kick the envy monster to the curb. Your success becomes tied to the success of others. You’re sure to find this approach more meaningful and joyful, and the sense of being stifled by envy will dissipate.Be Grateful
Finally, a surefire way to squash a sense of envy is to foster one of deep gratitude. Envy and gratitude are incompatible. Rather than allowing your focus to center on what you lack, focus on all of the beauty, goodness, and immense blessings you have in your life.If you’re reading this article right now, you’re literate, you have access to information, you have a moment to pause and read something you (hopefully) find valuable, and you’re alive with air in your lungs and eyes that can see. Water flows when you turn on your faucet, and when you open your refrigerator, I bet there’s some food in there you could eat.
You may be grateful for your family, your education, your home, your spiritual beliefs, your friends, your favorite sweatshirt, or your great potential.
Everyone is walking their own unique path in life, complete with ups and downs. Celebrate when you see others enjoying good fortune.
Unchecked envy can color every aspect of your life, encourage a victim mentality, and hinder your ability to reach your fullest potential. When you sense envy in yourself, do what you can to eliminate it and live with more gratitude, hope, and lightness as you go forward. You’ll not only uplift the quality of your own life but that of those around you as well.
