It’s Not You. It’s Her': Stranger Says to Little Girl Abused by Her Mom on Elevator

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From the archives: This story was last updated in March 2019.

Words of Wisdom aims to highlight important morals, which we feel our readers will benefit from reading. We hope you enjoy this fable.

“When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” For young children, they may find it difficult when faced with life’s adversities. However, when someone steps in to offer some words of advice, or simply a little warmth—it can make all the difference.

Ed Solomon, an American writer, producer, and director, shared a story on his Twitter account of a little girl who received kind words from a stranger who had witnessed the girl’s mom berating her. The story resonated with many people, especially those who had been in a similar situation.

“The other day a woman related a story to me about how her mother had viciously berated her since she was a child,” he wrote. “And how one day it was happening in an elevator—in front of others.”

In this situation, onlookers may or may not intervene, but one of them did in an indirect way.

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“When the door opened on their floor the mother bolted out [sic] but just as SHE started to go … a stranger—a random person who happened to be there—whispered, ‘Hey.’ And the (then 11 yr old) girl turned back. The stranger said: “It’s not you. It’s her.” And then the elevator door closed,” Solomon recalled.

Though it was only seven words, it had a great impact on the woman, who, as a child, believed all the harsh words that her mother threw at her.

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Solomon wrote that the now-53-year-old woman told him that when life was sometimes hard for her, she could hear “her (inner) mother’s voice” telling her how “she can’t do it, or to just plain give up.” But at that moment, she “sees that stranger’s face as the door closes in front of her.”

“Sometimes it’s the only thing that keeps her going,” Solomon wrote.

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Solomon explained the message that he was trying to get across.

“If you have a nice thing to say—a word of encouragement, a compliment—even if it’s to a passing stranger ... Don’t hold onto it. Cause you just never know where and when it will land.”

After his tweet went viral, many people wrote that they had received kind words from strangers while young, and the words still stick with them now.

One wrote: “I was beaten and abused as a kid and my teacher told me at age 9 ( she whispered) ‘one day you’ll write all your wonderful stories down and people will listen to the girl that you hide just now ... it will come out and you’ll be proud of yourself’ I never forgot Miss Miller.”

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The woman who was the protagonist of the story also commented on the tweet. “I was the kid in the elevator but the dressing down was in Bengali. I think her tone gave it away though. A word like this would have made all the difference,” she wrote.

It just goes to show how a little encouragement can go a long way.