Healthy Boundaries
Often, when we’re upset with others, it is because their actions have inadvertently crossed our boundaries. In such situations, we direct the blame outward, on the other person for not respecting our limits.While we should take care not to disregard a person’s comfort zone, we should also remember that protecting and maintaining our boundaries is not another person’s job.
Think about international boundaries: countries don’t simply draw lines on the ground and expect the rest of the world to respect them. Border guards are specifically appointed to stop those who try to enter a country without permission.
Similarly, your personal boundaries are your priority. It is up to you to set them and protect them against violation.
1. Learn About Your Values and Limits
First, take some time out for introspection. Self-analysis can help you discover what you need to know about your values and beliefs. Once you know what’s important to you, you will be able to communicate the same to others in a better way.2. Let People Know About Your Boundaries
3. Be Firm and Assertive
Sometimes, you may find yourself trapped in an uncomfortable situation despite letting the other person know how you feel. People may not take your boundaries seriously because your limits are not their priority. Don’t let others talk you into or out of things without considering your feelings. Stating some healthy boundaries firmly and clearly may seem daunting because it is easier and less stressful to avoid confrontation.4. Practice Saying ‘NO.’
Sometimes, we forget that it is okay to refuse others when we don’t want to do something. Instead, we keep saying yes to more and more things, without realizing that we will ultimately end up with hardly any time or energy for ourselves. The next time you find yourself in a situation that doesn’t align with your boundaries, practice saying no.5. Don’t Set Boundaries Without Consequences
When you set healthy boundaries for yourself, in whichever aspect of your life, do remember to decide how you would handle a situation where someone pushed your boundaries. Then, if your boundaries are crossed, make sure to follow through on the consequences you have promised.6. Make Self-care a Priority
A healthy way to preserve your boundaries is by dedicating time for self-care. Set aside some time for yourself to indulge in activities that make you happy and keep you balanced.7. Know That It’s Okay to Walk Away
If you have been more than explicit about your boundary, and the other person (friend, family member, or a colleague) still refuses to respect it, you must show yourself some kindness and walk away. Engaging with them when they respond to your boundaries with backlash or arguments will only cause you more stress.Healthy boundaries are necessary to live a mentally and emotionally stable life. Even if you’re new to this habit of maintaining boundaries, know that it’ll get more comfortable with a little more courage and practice.
So, keep at it, learn to stand up for yourself, and the world will learn to treat you with the respect you know you deserve.