Then the detergents were wrecked through the same means, eliminating the phosphates that had always been in soap.
Then the dryers came into play. They were never a true substitute for hanging clothing in the sun. Over time, they have wreaked havoc on fabrics while dulling their color over time. And today they are less hot and powerful than they used to be.
What has been the consequence? Look around at your friends and coworkers. Either they are not wearing white or the whites are vaguely dull and unimpressive. Why is this? All the essential tools for making clothing super white have been taken away from us, mostly by government regulations.
Notice that laundry-room cabinetry is now packed with a huge array of products. They include bleaches, softeners, stain removers, power boosters, sticks, treatments, towelettes, and an array of detergents. Why is this? Because our clothes are not getting clean.
Consistent with the American ethos, we figure that some new product somewhere is likely to fix our problem. We keep buying until we find it. People are simply unaware of the hidden hand of government in this entire fiasco.
Oddly, some of the products are extremely damaging to clothing. Bleach is hideous for cottons, like an acid designed to destroy their substance. There might be times when it is absolutely necessary for spot use but general use is a terrible idea. And yet people do it all the time. They wonder why they keep having to replace their old cottons with new ones.
And yet there is a path forward, through the thicket of government regulations.
The first element is hot water. To get whites really white, you need very hot water. You can add boiling water directly to the washing machine. There should be steam coming out of that water before you add your clothes.
There is no clean laundry—and this goes for colors too—without using trisodium phosphate (found in the paint section of the hardware store). Everyone serious about laundry knows this now. The purpose of TSP is to break down the soap and whisk it away in the water. This was banned by government regulations some 25 years ago, to the detriment of all laundry. The ostensible reason was to save the fish from excess algae growth in ponds, punishing domestic laundries rather than the real culprit, which is big agriculture.
There is still one more step, and this one will probably be news to you. It was certainly news to me. There is a process of getting clothing extra super-duper white that is called Bluing. I’d never heard of it until a few years ago.
Can you believe that any company could have that degree of longevity? It’s amazing. And extremely charming. Yes, there are other companies that make a similar product but why bother?
It is a subtle blue dye. You mix a bit (just a few drops) in cold water and add it to your very hot water before adding your clothes. Make sure it is mixed well before putting in any clothes. Otherwise you will produce blue dots. This stuff is very strong but highly effective.
It adds just a hint of blue to your whites. You can’t see it. It depends on a bit of optical illusion by playing with the color spectrum: our eyes look at a tiny hint of blue and instead see white. So it doesn’t technically whiten but it sure does create the strong visual reality of whiter clothing, which is why there is such a strong market for this stuff.
If you know, you know.
The story behind this project is truly inspiring. It was discovered at the very height of the Gilded Age when people began really to care about getting clothing bright white.
If you think about it, white clothing signifies the rise out of the state of nature. Everything in nature is dirty, grungy, dull. To wear white illustrates the advance of society, the achievement of cleanliness, the triumph over dirt and muck. It’s a symbol because only in the late 19th century did this become possible for the masses of people.
The story of the bottle design alone is fascinating. The old lady on the bottle was supposed to be the creator’s wife, but she refused to pose. So he grabbed a picture of his mother-in-law and gave it to the artists.
She was then immortalized. In the 1970s, the company tried to modernize the picture, but consumers raged in revolt and the image reverted. It will likely never change again.
Bluing your whites is the final touch, and probably won’t do the trick unless the other factors are in place.
Knowing how to make clothes white is a skill of its own, a way of demonstrating that despite all government depredations, and the conspiracy to make our clothing dull, you possess the wherewithal to nonetheless rise above the state of nature and achieve something truly extraordinary.
Hey, we do what we can with what we can control to make the world a better place, despite everything. This product is available. It’s not expensive. It works. It’s at least one small step toward a better world.
