A consensus seems to be emerging. Civilization as we knew it only a few years ago appears to be decaying. Life is taking on ever more features of the famous description of Thomas Hobbes: solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short.
You probably agree and would like to do something about it. But what?
We’ve lived through many decades of improvement in so many areas of life. It’s been a difficult adjustment for the past four years to experience a dramatic turnabout that seems ongoing.
There was a time when change was universally greeted as a good thing: better technology, better information, better tools, and more opportunities.
Ever since the Great Reset, the expectations and connotations of the word change have flipped. Whatever it is, you can predict that the change will be toward something worse, more degraded, more debased, and so on.
This is a broad description, but don’t you find it strangely applicable? Prices are the most obvious case. Nothing goes down in price and up in quality. It is always the reverse. Goods and services are higher in price while the quality is worsened at the same time.
Being surrounded by that reality casts a kind of pall over daily events and choices and affects how we look at the world. It determines whether we expect the dawn or the darkness, and this outlook tends to be self-fulfilling in one way or another.
Lately, I’ve been thinking about small ways that we can assist in stopping the decline.
Let’s drill down a bit.
There is a small bakery in town run by a nice lady from Guatemala. Daily, she makes the most perfect cookies, pastries, brownies, breads, and fruit tarts. It’s a tiny business that somehow miraculously survived lockdowns and, by tradition, still keeps the quality very high and the prices relatively low, even in our current times.
I’ve hopped in and out of there for years with the usual pleasantries but nothing more.
It occurred to me suddenly what an anomaly this one shop is in the world, something of high standards and quality available to everyone. The way things are going, I suddenly imagined the possibility of the shop’s closing. I have zero evidence that this is possible, but I just imagined it.
In response, I decided to speak up and just tell her how wonderful it is that her shop exists, that her food is amazing, and how much she is appreciated. I said the same thing on various review sites so that people know about her. It’s a small point, but maybe if times are hard and getting harder, my note might offer a slight boost of confidence to push through.
I don’t know if it makes a difference, but it might. I cannot fix underlying finances or consumer demand, but in a small way, I can perhaps offer some moral support.
We all can.
Do you thank your merchants enough? Do you point out to a good server how pleased you are that he or she speaks clear English, works hard, and does a great job? Do we speak to our neighbors and thank them for being good neighbors? Are we showing sympathy when others in our lives are having a hard time? Are we praising the hotels, restaurants, theaters, and others when they hold the line against decay?
We should. It’s small, but it is the sort of thing that makes a difference in people’s lives. It’s a matter of using our personal weight of opinion and voice to support the good that people do and not merely regret and condemn all that is going wrong all around us.
In contrast, the other day, I was at a major arts venue of historical importance (sparing the name here). It just unveiled a new feature: The huge restrooms on the main floor are now slated for all gender identities and expressions, whatever that means. Men and women stood in line together and entered the same room and traded in and out of various stalls. They seemed to be the only option.
This I can promise you: 100 percent of the patrons were very upset, creeped out, disoriented, clinched-jawed, and quietly furious. No one spoke to anyone else, and no one stood in the mirrors after and fixed their looks or otherwise lingered. It was in and out with great alarm.
It was obvious what everyone was thinking: What in the heck is going on around here when it becomes somehow politically intolerable to distinguish between men and women?
Rather than just seething as everyone else was, I decided to write a note—yes, it took a bit of effort—and explain that what they have done is contrary to the wishes of the customers. They decided to make some big political point out of biological realities and, as a result, risked scandalizing anyone and everyone of any sort of traditional leanings, religious or otherwise. This serves no point. It’s one thing to offer a gender-fluid option; it’s something else to force everyone into only that option.
My note was not angry but merely letting them know. Does this make a difference? I don’t know, but maybe my note will combine with hundreds of others to inspire a change toward more respect for customers. Clearly, this major institution has been vexed and manipulated by a tiny group to institute something utterly insane. Why would they give in? Because there were not enough people on the other side to stop it.
If we don’t speak out in small ways, I realized, the decline will surely continue without any pushback. If there is going to be pushback, someone has to do it.
At the same time, I started to appreciate anew the institutions that are upholding values consistent with the good life: good service, decorum in manners and dress, attention to quality, genuine commitment to excellence, and so on. When you run into examples of this, it is something you can do to point it out and praise it.
You might even decide to curate your consumption to back those you think are doing their best to hold the line against the decline. It could be anything, even a construction worker who is repairing your building, a person who helps someone else cross the street, a man who gives up his seat on a train for an elderly person, someone who helps someone else with a bag on a plane, or anything.
It’s of course the same with your choices over friendships and social occasions. Support the good and avoid the bad. This is how we hold on and rebuild.
In addition, we can all do these things ourselves. You don’t need to become an organization founder or a famous activist on TV. You can do more good with small choices in your own life.
Rather than giving into the attitude of decline and fully expecting the darkness of night to be the next step, we can proceed through life with a determination to make sure that it does not happen. We can all do something, even if it’s very small, but those actions might make a big difference.
Once you start paying attention to the signs of those who are trying to improve the world rather than tear it down, you will find them everywhere. Sometimes, a little voicing of support is all that is necessary to make sure it continues. Reward the good and stand up against the bad: Everyone can do this in small ways.
Yes, we need much bigger changes to save the world. Above all else, we need a new respect for freedom and rights, and that requires dramatic political change. But we cannot count on that, and, in addition, big changes are downstream from the small ones. There are features of life we do control, and here is where everyone can be part of the change.
