I recently left an emotionally abusive relationship.
After months of insults I wont repeat, false accusations, lies, delusions, broken mirrors, nightly battles... I left.
I know that I was being poisoned by each day that I stayed. So with a heavy heart, I left my lover of three years, knowing that I had already put it off too long. At first he begged, then he cursed, but eventually he packed his bags and faded out of my life like a bad dream. For the first few weeks, my body seemed to reject this. For three years I had seen the world through him-colored glasses. I didn’t know who I was without him. Despite the kindness of friends and even strangers. I could not help feeling utterly alone. But it was this sense of aloneness that set me free.
Somewhere along the way, I let go.
I released all of the painful memories, the names he had called me, the shards of him buried deep in my brain. I stopped believing the things he had made me think about myself.
I began to see how extraordinary, breathtakingly beautiful life is. I meditated, drank too much coffee, talked to strangers, laughed at nothing. I wrote poetry and stopped to smell and photograph every flower. Once I discovered that my happiness depends only on myself, nothing could hurt me anymore.
I have found and continue to find peace.
Each day I am closer to it than I was yesterday. I am a work in progress but I am full to the brim with gratitude and joy. And so, since I have opened a new chapter in my life, I want to peacefully part with the contents of the last chapter.
The end of my relationship was the catalyst for a wealth of positive changes in my life. It was a symbol, most importantly, it was an act of self-love. It was a realization that I deserved to be happy and I could choose to be. And so, in an effort to leave behind the things that do not help me grow, I am letting go of a relic from the painful past. I wore this necklace-a gift from him-every day for over two years. To me, letting it go is a joyous declaration that I am moving forward with strength and grace and deep, lasting peace.
Please accept this gift as a reminder that we all deserve happiness. Whoever you are, and whatever pain you have faced, I hope you find peace.
Namaste, Jamie
One person in the comments section claimed the writer was his ex-girlfriend, but not the man she was referring to in the letter.
“So, I’m fairly certain this is a note from an ex-girlfriend. No, I’m not the guy she’s referring to, she and I dated for a year and a half before they started dating. She and I broke up 3.5 years ago so the timing seems to work,” he wrote. He added: “I was floored. We went to India together in 2011 and I know she and the guy she dated afterwards went together as well. She got pretty into the likes of Ram Das and Jack Kornfield so I wouldn’t put it past her to end a letter to a stranger that way.”
And he added: “There’s plenty of girls named Jamie that fly through SFO. I can see I’m not the only one that thinks this is an ex. Either way, I’m glad she’s on her way to recovery.”
Jack Phillips
Breaking News Reporter
Jack Phillips is a breaking news reporter who covers a range of topics, including politics, U.S., and health news. A father of two, Jack grew up in California's Central Valley. Follow him on X: https://twitter.com/jackphillips5