Almost every time my wife, Heather, and I used to go on vacation, we’d spend time during the car or plane ride home going back and forth about how nice it would be to live full-time in the destination we had just visited. By the time we got home, we inevitably talked ourselves out of the idea.
Too hot. Too cold. Too expensive. Too isolated. Too big. Too small. Too ... whatever. No matter the destination, we came up with a reason why it wasn’t realistic.
That is, until we visited Traverse City, Michigan.
Despite being Michigan residents and lifelong Midwesterners, Traverse City was hiding in plain sight from us. It’s best known as the “cherry capital” of the United States. While the town swells with hundreds of thousands of tourists during peak summer months, Traverse City’s full-time population is only around 17,000 residents.
Traverse City is located on the shores of Lake Michigan, at the base of two peninsulas that are filled with vineyards and cherry orchards. In my opinion, it’s one of the most beautiful places on earth, with endless white sandy beaches, lush fields, towering forests, and sparkling blue lakes all around.
Good schools. Affordable (or at least more affordable than we were accustomed to) cost of living. A nearby airport for business travel. Culture. Entrepreneurial vibe. Easy access to the outdoors. Family-friendly environment. As we explored Traverse City that weekend, we started checking all the boxes for what we were looking for out of a place to live.
The ride home was different after that weekend. Heather’s time in the car spent looking at houses on Zillow was more purposeful. The possibility of picking up and starting over someplace new felt real. We arrived home excited about the prospect of a fresh start.
And that’s when things got hard. You see, our small-town fantasy had always been an indulgence. Flirting with a life in a new place had merely been a form of escapism for when life became monotonous. By never seriously considering a move to a small town to be a real option, we could focus only on the upside benefits and never the downside consequences of such a move.
Then Traverse City called our bluff.
Flocking to Small Towns
We’ve all seen the statistics and heard the anecdotes: Across the country, there is an exodus of people from big cities to smaller towns. COVID-19 has been a big catalyst of the urban-to-rural migration, but it was happening at a rapid pace even before the pandemic.U.S. census figures show that since 2014, an average of about 30,000 residents between 25 and 39 have left big cities annually. In this sense, as in many other ways, COVID-19 has been more of an accelerant of an existing trend rather than a change agent.
With the benefit of five years of hindsight, it’s no surprise to us that more people are seeking the simplicity of a small-town lifestyle. It’s not for everyone—many people can’t imagine leaving the big city for what they perceive to be a painfully boring existence “in the sticks.”
Happiness Isn’t Destination
In his book “Happier,” Harvard lecturer Tal Ben-Shahar defines the “arrival fallacy,” which is a corollary to the concept of hedonic adaptation. He describes the arrival fallacy as: “The false belief that reaching a valued destination can sustain happiness.”I’ve certainly fallen victim to the arrival fallacy in my previous life. I have felt at first elated, then almost immediately letdown, following job promotions, raises, and new car or home purchases. I wanted these things so badly, but the reality of obtaining them was far different than my expectations.
Ambition isn’t a bad thing. In fact, it’s a very good thing. If humans didn’t want for more then we’d still be living in caves, without access to basic, modern human necessities such as electricity and clean water, nor marvels of human potential, like great works of art, architecture, and music.
Problems arise when we allow the unending pursuit of growth and acquisition to inhibit our pursuit of happiness. Both ambitions—for happiness and for growth—can coexist, but only in balance. Growth can crowd out a happy life if you’re not careful.
Smaller Towns, More Happiness
I’ve lived in big cities and suburbs, and now reside in a small town. At least for me, my small town has enabled and empowered me to be happier than I’ve ever been. I attribute this mostly to the simplicity of the small-town lifestyle. There are fewer bright and shiny distractions in a small town, which allows for more space and time to focus on what matters.Here are seven reasons why life in a small town has made us happier—and perhaps it will make you happier, too.
Have you, like us, fantasized about what life would be like in a small town? Life is short, and you only get one shot at it, so don’t let fear stop you from finding the place and crafting the lifestyle that will bring you happiness.
As Seth Godin has said: “Instead of wondering when your next vacation is, maybe you should set up a life you don’t need to escape from.”